No words.
My beautiful bride was the one who sent me a quick text and snapshot of J covering his tear filled eyes, holding his head, as a wave of grief ran over him at lunch. He was missing a friend who passed away.
J loves YouTube.
For all the dilemmas and pitfalls of the internet, YouTube “How-To” videos have been a developmental aid to J with his unique challenges. Every night as he’s winding down, an “Ask This Old House” kind of video helps him leave the activities of the day behind and center into quietness. He’ll then put the tablet or phone down and talk (out loud) through his day often reiterating some technical tidbit he just learned. He’s not speaking to anyone in particular but to everyone simultaneously, including Sophia, the 15lb feline fur-ball that resides with us.
We regularly listen to the radio. J loves the local Christian pop station and often, hysterically, thinks the DJs are talking directly and only to him. He’ll come in sometimes to tell us about a community event we need to donate to or help with as, again, he thinks they were telling him for his sake alone. So it goes with YouTube videos.
One of J’s favorite YouTube friends has been Grant Thompson, known for his show “The King of Random”. Last week Grant was in an accident and passed away. My lovely Sarah, J’s momma, explained to J that Grant died but it didn’t seem to sink in at the moment. Then a couple of days later, while out for lunch, just the two of them, J was sad, he reached for his momma’s hand and tears streamed down his face. Suddenly, it hit him. As Sarah put it: “It was a hard day. When words don’t come easily to you and grief is a new feeling to you, it makes for some hard days. #nosmilestoday #restinpeacegrantthompson #thefriendwenevermet”
While caring for J these 20+ years there have certainly been some sad moments.
J has experienced physical pain from injuries and sickness.
He’s definitely been scared and disoriented at times.
But Grief...Grief is new in his experience.
Honestly, it’s something I never considered he’d experience because I’ve never thought he had the emotional bandwidth nor depth. And then a friend he’d never met in person, but someone he’d speak of as if he’d stopped by and just left the house, that kind of friend, leaves this side and it knocks J hard.
We are still learning.
Still loving.
Still realizing new things about J.
I’m a thankful Daddy for Grant Thompson’s work and legacy
and how important it is, has been and yet will be for J.
Rest in peace, Grant.
